Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Listography! List 55: Things I like to do when I'm alone:

I rather like being alone. As a child I remember walking the perimeter of the playground, thinking up little songs to myself. As a teenager I spent a lot of time in my room. Although now I consider myself fairly social (some of which I've really had to teach/force out of myself) 
but deep down their is certainly a need for solitude.

A need that right now as a mother of young children tends to get back-burnered.
But if I ever DO get a chance to be alone, here's some things I'd love to do!

1. Shower and/or go to bathroom (usually these both happen with at least one child crying at the door, that is if I have the audacity to shut them out!)

2. Blog (I have an ever-growing list of "drafts" waiting to be finished). Writing is something I love, but it does take a certain degree of concentration, and alone is best. But I take what I can get. So if my typos and gramatical errors are driving you bonkers, please know I was probably in the midst of tuning out three little boys and all the clammer they can produce, so please forgive me. 

3. One of my favorite places to be alone is in the car. I think this is because I am captive. There is nothing for me to clean (well my van is filthy but who can clean whilst driving?) 
I love cranking music and singing along--loud. I usually sing til I cry, and then up the beat til I's a manic mess to be sure full of delicious inhibition. This works best at night of course, so the dark prevents other drivers from becoming too concerned about the crazy women apparently having some sort of mental breakdown.
I also listen to a lot of talks in the car. Best place to ensure my full attention. 
Long Alberta highways are so cathartic.

4. Read. Preferably outside. I think I should read in the winter more (snuggled by the fire perhaps?) but summers is in actuality when I get through more books. In my house there are endless distractions, tidying this or that, dealing with kids demands--inevitably my best intentions to read get thwarted. But in the summer I can plop on the swing (in essence our outdoor couch, and best piece of furniture we've ever purchased!) and get lost in good writing, while the kids happily wander about the yard or jump on the tramp. But I need to stop or I'll get all piny for summer. 

5. Yoga or a good run--depending on my need. Do I need to center myself and calm my mind? Or do I need to hit the pavement and get my restless body occupied so the stress can find it's way out with my panting breaths? I do neither of these as often as I should. Do to the lack of alone time? Yoga, especailly with kids around is less effective, because if you are anywhere near the floor, you bet your kids are right on top of ya!

6. Eat...yummy snacks I'd rather not share.

7. People watch. Especially if I'm traveling alone.
 I like to assemble my own Lost "cast" if we crashed.

8. Watch movies I know Ben would hate. Slow emotional/and or artsy ones. Ones with lots of talking or just  looks that "say it all". Ones with no car chases, no fight scenes or dumb girls (not to say that's what Ben likes, just painting some polar opposites for you). The day of my last class of my first year at University I took myself on a date, rode the bus to the cheap theaters and saw a movie all by myself. It was delightful.

9. Be in nature. I'm still such a rural girl at heart, and spend so much time growing up outdoors. There is still a big part of me that craves staring up at star-lite nights, or unhurried clouds. I long to give my kids this same appreciation...

9. Think. A little deeper. Or a little broader. Or just at all. I'm grateful for rare quiet moments where the Lord can impress upon my heart and mind messages He's been trying to "get through to me". 

To know I'm never really alone. And for Him to tell me who I really am.

... It may seem odd to think of having a relationship with ourselves, but we do. Some people can’t get along with themselves. They criticize and belittle themselves all day long until they begin to hate themselves. May I suggest that you reduce the rush and take a little extra time to get to know yourself better. Walk in nature, watch a sunrise, enjoy God’s creations, ponder the truths of the restored gospel, and find out what they mean for you personally. Learn to see yourself as Heavenly Father sees you—as His precious daughter or son with divine potential.
                                                                ----Pres Uchtdorf